The Pink Mama Project
This project is incredibly near and dear to my heart. It is ultimately my hope to make an impact by showing a little love and light to someone who desperately needs it. While attending a women’s workshop, my group was asked by the coach, “Who are you here to serve?” Without any hesitation, my hand shot up: “Young women, but especially young mothers.” That evening, I shared my story with this lovely group and was so relieved to feel no inkling of shame or guilt. In fact, this is what has inspired me to pursue the thing l have dreamt about for a long time.
My Story
When I was fifteen years old, I found out I was pregnant. Abortion was the first word to come out of my parents’ mouths. I was too young to care for a child, they said. For two weeks I awoke every morning consumed with all of the what-ifs. I was so aware of this baby growing inside of me. The questions swirled in my mind non-stop: “Is she going to love girly things like me? Will she be a tomboy? Is he going to be into baseball or soccer? I wonder if she will have my jet black hair, or will he have hazel eyes like his father?” It was heartbreaking to think I might never know the answers. When my parents decided against abortion, it was then easy for me to make the choice to keep this baby.
During this time when I was frantically trying to cope with becoming a mother, my own mother was losing her battle to an aggressive, evil cancer. My mother thought that keeping my baby would give her the strength to keep fighting. Tragically when 6 months pregnant and 2 days before my 16th birthday - my mother lost her year-long battle with cancer. The fear, the uncertainty, the darkness that consumed me made me unsettled. The realization that I really didn’t know what I was going to do with this baby hit me. I was still a child myself and I felt so alone. Then on July 14 at the tender age of sixteen, I gave birth to my beautiful and healthy daughter. But the difficulty of young motherhood hit me fast. I constantly felt the need to prove myself to people and if I’m being honest I still sometimes struggle with this. Everywhere I went, I could sense the judgement and criticism. I have memories of strangers asking me how old I was and if the baby was mine. I was insecure and hyper aware when giving my birthdate to my daughter’s doctors and child care facilities. I could see them doing the math in their heads. I would feel ashamed and self-conscious, but how I loved my little girl! If anything could take away the pain of losing my mother and all the emotions I was feeling at that time, it was the love that filled my heart when I held and cuddled my sweet baby. I believe becoming a mother at any age is hard and it is true that you’re never fully ready. Whoever thinks they are - well sister, just you wait! I could have easily handled this all differently, and sometimes I’m surprised that I didn’t. I could have faced this type of adversity by wallowing in self-pity and occasionally I did. It was messy. On top of losing my mother, playing a real life game of “house” at 16 with my high school boyfriend wasn’t as fun as many teens would imagine. The stress and responsibility of going to school, working, taking care of a baby, and trying to have some semblance of a healthy and mature relationship turned my life completely upside down. I processed all the hard and the bad and dealt with it the best I could. I used it as momentum to push and keep going. I have gone through some difficult times and I know other might be going through the same thing. Yet I’m so grateful for it because it brought me here. Now I have two beautiful children, a wonderful marriage, and a business that I own and believe in. It is now clear that my reason for going through these motions in life is so I could have the tools, compassion, and strength to be able to encourage a young mother who might be feeling the way I once did: scared, helpless, overwhelmed, insecure, shameful, stressed, and so much more that words can’t begin to convey. With The Pink Mama Project this is indeed what I will do. This is my purpose.
Why The “Pink Mama” Project?
The name came to me while I was on my way to the Post Office to ship packages. I realized my sweater was pink, my tote mail bag was pink, my packaging supplies were pink - everything was pink, and my mother’s favorite color was pink. When I found out I was having a girl at age 16, it was one of the happiest days of my life. Why? Because I couldn’t wait to buy pink dresses, pink frilly socks, and paint her little nails pink. I realized this was the absolute perfect name!
Pink Mama Mission
What exactly is the Pink Mama Project? The Pink Mama Project teams up with various organizations to give back a portion of proceeds to mothers in need. This is life to me. This is what feeds my soul. If I can give an ounce of relief, comfort, or love to a mother in need then I feel I would truly be serving my God given purpose.
XO
Brooklyn Jayne